The year of no regrets

 We are now more than 40% through the year.  Its the sort of the year where you feel that time is passing by fast.  There's the other 40, the age--- that isn't too far away for me-- a year and three fourths. Which probably explains why it feels it's been the sort of a year where you can feel the "time decay" to use a analogy from financial markets/ derivatives-- where things aren't moving or atleast in directions you want to and that itself means there's a loss of "value"

It's not the sort of the year where you feel the " inner peace" that I alluded to in a previous post. Its not the sort of the year where life has chugged along calmly.  It's not the sort of the year where too much has changed either.  Or rather, the more they change, the more they remain the same - as they say.

Its not the year where luck has gone my way.  As yet atleast.  Its not the year where I can claim to have done everything perfect. 

But there's one thing this year has been for me- the year of no regrets. 

I can't claim to be feeling the inner peace that I mentioned in an earlier post, but what I do feel is an inner satisfaction. I can't claim to be optimistic that  everything will turn out fine or that things would be any sort of a fairly tale .  But what I can hope to is to give today the best shot I can,  with the hope that I can face up to whatever tomorrow throws at me. With all my limitations and flaws ofcourse.  With all the lessons learnt from today and yesterday.  

Not all of what I learnt yesterday would be useful tomorrow ofcourse.  There are no counterfactuals in life and there aren't too mant times you cross the same river twice.  But to the extent that life in itself is a learning experience.

When I look back I will of course always find a thing or two I could have done differently or better, time I should put to use more productively, things I could have worked more harder on and decisions I could have made differently,  but for now, 2023 is a year of no regrets.


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